Friday, May 13, 2011

hoping for miracle

May is such a quiet month.. Just concentrate of earning more bucks n stop myself from thinking too much. My medical reports was superb but doctor say my body was fatigue and need to rest more if i want myself to be health in the long run. So i decided to cut down my classes by increasing my pay. It might sound a bit funny but i think is a way i save my body n wallet at the same time.Hopefully some bosses understand my situation

Seem i'm cool down more every months bcoz i keep telling myself things will be over soon but i know it will never end, Why am i still holding on? i really donno how to answer this question but everything look so wrong sometimes.I feel neglected, the way i being pamper is different, most of the things is treated a different way then it was. I think i should just keep myself quiet, cool, happy, and flow with everything. Waiting for miracle to happen is like waiting for someone dead n come back alive. Never had such a worst feeling before. I feel like give up my crews, myself n walk away to have a better life.This is what happen last time to Racken Force. I don't wish history to be repeated. I don't wanna feel regret again. What i can do is wait for the Miracle.
But however waiting has the time limit, when it strike mean is over. So i hope before it strike miracle will hit if not i'm speechless to say it now.

Life goes on. I just keep telling myself *enough of everything* is time to pamper myself.
I start shopping, massage, hair do, manicure. really feel like a princess or can be call Enjoyment as a lady. Next i wan to buy heel, nice dress, skirt, or blouse. Make myself pretty, sexy. Next will go nite out party, dating, woohoo. It sound so naughty n nasty but i like. I should be enjoying my life for now. Yohoo!! can't wait to make myself pretty n happy :)

Hope everything goes well n miracle happen.. *PRAY*

Monday, May 2, 2011

April end with ;(

Is April the holiday, the birthday, the celebration that i been waiting and waiting.. It started with a happy, holiday heart when the calendar strike 22 april 12am to 23th april. the uneasy feeling strike me again. I keep feeling there is something happen but i keep telling myself is not true. But as usual i will check in whatever way to find out the truth..then i put it aside bcoz it wasn't strong enough to prove the lies.

On 24th April is the day i meet him and ready for our holiday. I prepare the present n a little surprise when he back to SG. I reach SG at 4.30pm then i walk around n eat my lunch.Prepare for class at 6.30pm my adek teaching. At 6.10pm my phone rang, he call me say he is at airport. My heart was hit by an arrow n burst. I turn speechless n lost. I break my promise with adek,arjuna n others saying got to go. I went to the airport n saw him sitting outside with t-shirt is was so hurtful. I can;t even smile n give him a big hugs or kiss. I feel so stupid.But i maintain n went home with him book air ticket,hotel room n pack everything for our holiday in Taiwan.1st holiday together going so far.Excited but feeling got mix up.

On 25th morning we went to airport at 5am. So freaking early but we are like half awake so we sleep all the way in the flight after we ate our breakfast.I'm putting the things aside n enjoy myself with him. He pamper me n take care of me bcoz the seat is not really i sleep on his thigh.feel so good n i slept all the way :) Reach taiwan at 12pm. then we get our stuff n check in to the hotel. The hotel is so nice n clean good choice. After that we went for lunch then sleep.HAHA
after the sleep, we hit to SHIHLIN at 8.30pm then we eat,shop,n drink XD.
He bought me a air troupe just newly arrive.He really pamper me. I really kiss n hugs him so tight. Feel the holiday is so superb.

26th we went to XiMEN DING for shopping. We took bus, train. DIE DIE no taxi trying to save money n shop more. XD We walk almost the whole place n found many many cool stuff. He like it but the price is EX especially the stuff he like.. never seem to get anything from XIMENDING then we went to find the NEw Era cap as VOn told me. hahaha found the shop using iphone map. but he don like cap so we went back hotel after tat. LAter at 8.40pm we went to shihlin again for food n shopping. This time we plan to play 5-10 so we bought some soft drink to mix with liqour. Is such a bad nite i lost most of the game n i drunk. I start making so much noise n say out alots of foul words. i can't control my emotion after i found something. HAIZZZ bad nite

27th wake up with headache n migraine. Hate myself for drinking so much n i really can't remember what did i say to him. i took panadol then watch tv til he wake up. Then we went out to miramar wheels n walk around n have lunch.I was putting the sadness aside n enjoy myself. Then we took alots of picture walking around the shopping mall. But seem taiwan shopping mall very quite n boring. At 7pm we decide to go Shihlin again for dinner. This time Q for the fried chicken then crab, then pearl drink, fruits, and etc.HAHA FAT!! i go crazy shopping for lil gift for my girls. After everything we were too tired n go back hotel. Back hotel my emotion start again.. arghhh!!! i hate myself.. This time no drink or anything just normal talk. I'm happy he tell me so much n decide to stay positive.Then i fall asleep after listening to everything.

28th we wake up late.Around 3pm we check out n went for lunch before taxi uncle pick us up to airport. We were very quiet today bcoz i seem lost of talking interest.But he remain cool n make me happy.After lunch, we go airport n bad news is flight delay one hour. AHH!!! then we went burger king. Here we eat n laugh. then suddenly me again emotion lose control n small fight. He stop the conversation n stop the fight. I remain quiet til we get ourself check in n board in. I think i was thinking too much til my head migraine. After we get our boarding ticket i lose balance n giddy n i fall to him. He got to take care of me again althought after the fight.I really donno what type of feeling should i have. Waited til like 9plus only the flight board when the time supposed to be 7.45pm. Haizxz. Feel not well n he still willing to take care of me after i mess up the holiday. buy food n drink for me, blanket me n kiss me on the forehead. TELL ME WHAT AM I DOING?

29th reach airport at 2am. Drive home n unpack is already 3plus. Tired doh!! going back kl later at 1pm. Really like marathon holiday.The next day i just feel asking him to rest at SG then follow me back KL rehearsal. But he willing to do as what we plan. Back to kl at 4.30pm then i rehearse with my girls. After tat we went for dinner at McD then movie at TGV watching THOR.. NICe movie n we enjoy our nite.I did bring up the topic n he say back home i silence again.

30th wake up at 8am n go 1u for show rehearsal. I pity myself so do him. I turn speechless sometimes donno what am i thinking about. And what is he doing n thinking about. :(
Showtime at 1.15pm end 1.40pm then we have a drink at Kluang Station with von, yvonne, bobby, astro ppl. At 2.40pm we left n hit back to Singapore. The traffic was bad that take us 5hours to reach Singapore. i start again n he end it again. We went staright to town for dinner with his friends then recognize studio for dance session bcoz cinema seem to be full.. So we left studio around 11.40pm. I feel so not happy bcoz i got the feeling again. back home i shower n rest don even feel like doing anything stupid again. But my emotion hit me again n i send him a sms with his reply i put myself in silence. I was planning to leave n drive back in the middle of the night but is really crazy if i do so. Then i tell myself sleep n wake up with a better mind.

1st May the day i hate it so much due to something. But i remain silence so tat i don't blow any bad words again. I was quite low emotion n reaction. He trying to make everything fine. We went out for breakfast then back home. he pack his stuff i play iphone game,online. Then later we watch some dance video together.Clock hitz 4pm then out we go to airport as he is working on LAbour day. I drive back kl after he report in n send me to the car. I start my journey back KL again alone. I hate it when i'm alone bcoz my mind will start all the rubbish thinking again. I really need someone to tell me what i'm doing is rite or wrong. I admit whatever sh*T i did to find out the truth is wrong. I"m sorry. i really can;t control my emotion. Staying cool is not the way anymore.
i just need u to stop lying to me n hurt me.

2nd may I'm writing this blog just to make myself not to think so much of him.But it doesn't really help as i will just miss him n think about him everynite n day. i'm no longer the happy go lucky girl, crazy crazy everyday, smile n talk non-stop. hyperactive, why isst my age or i just change. Now i feel myself is more serious, tired, overwork, stress, worry. What happen to me? why am i facing so much stress? Am i putting all the stress to me? Can i runaway from it?
I need to plan a holiday.A good one no more wack,sh*t moment.


Friday, April 1, 2011

i wish

Day by day it pass so fast... i'm still can't really move on with things that happen to me. i wish i can wake up from this nightmare that haunt me for so many months. People do say scorpio are strong but too strong in so many things end up i get hurt badly without anyone feeling the pain with me. I hope i can sting like a scorpio n cold blooded like others. But too bad i'm feeling myself changing in so many ways. Getting softer n weaker. I hate this feeling of not being strong, maybe i really need a getaway so i can think what do i really wanna achieve from all this shits i been going through. Hmmm should plan one... :) I wish i can be more cruel n bad ass girl like last time. hahaha but is good to be good girl now but too good also not good..XD sound funny but just feel tired after a long day outside everyday n just wanna back home n rest on my bed everynight. I wish i can hang out with friends n have some chatting session with friends but just tired for me after a long day.When people look at me they ask *why u so tired as u only teach dance only* .. haizz yes i'm a dance teacher but i teach school in the morning, afternoon just a few hours rest then nite classes again. The tiredness is hard to describe as i got my job, my crew, my bf, my family,and myself to handle. I like to plan things in advance bcoz i hate last minutes bcoz it might cos u a bomb in cash form or problems. But i plan too much sometimes till i have stress.. haha *WHAT A LIFE I CHOOSE TO HAVE* Who can help me with this? or who can give me a peace of minds? i think some should kn0w the answer but i think u just donno.. :X i'm always being so strong n wrap everything to be done by myself but is not really good, it hurt me physically n mentally but is just my character. I love to be busy n work. i'm a workacholic to be say. Bcoz work can make me not to think so much n earn a respect for being so capable. ya i earn my respect from so many people bcoz i do my part as a teacher, or student or worker.I know some people don't like the way i talk but is me being straight forward n no hidden feeling. sorry la.. IS JUST ME.. I reallly need a good break n rest.. so i can think what are the things that i should do n shouldn't do.i fall in a big trap that lock up my brain from thinking straight or rasional. as my few months i been going through very down moment n emotional. Still wishing for it to over in a blink of eyes.But i know is impossible. SO PLEASE BECKY STOP THINKING. bcoz the more u think about how the process of it u hurt urself more n more.. I need to keep telling myself to be positive everyday. reading quotes to make myself feel better in my daily life. U will never feel how i feel bcoz u are not in my shoes. but world is round n i believe in this karma words * WHAT GOES AROUND, COMES AROUND* be careful with your action n thought **** I wish for it to end, and myself to be strong.

Thursday, March 24, 2011


i have to go through it again n again. But is still the same. Made the decision a few times n fail to walk away without turning back. I turn back because i'm soft hearted or love?? i really donno. LOST again..

I made a decision not on U but to myself bcoz everytime i made a decision on u i will always fail.
i decided to make this decision on myself. I donno what is your choice is all up to u now. I don't want to put myself down on this emotion thingy n crazy fight with u again n again due to a bloody *****!! so much i go through, i believe i can go through this one without fear anymore in time to come.

Think back all the words, promises is just words not action. That why my quote is ACTION SPEAKS LOUDER THAN WORDS.. that's why when i say i can mean i will do it. But i didn't keep my words when the first few fight bcoz my heart is not letting go. But is a bit broken to the level need plaster to paste it back.. And i'm pasting it back with glu so i can be hard hearted in time to come.Hopefully i can do it if the results is not going to be nice.

Fighting with u is not fun. Talking all those things i do feel myself irritating n annoying. reacting like crazy girl is nuts. Checking ur stuff is not my job. Being a pyschotic is sooooo not me.. All this is just nonsense when someone is HITS with a big knife to the heart or mind. I'm the one got hit.I never believe myself doing all those things to u. Because u are the first one i react like this. I was cooler n heartless last time. Walking away without even looking back. Now is like haizzz...

i can't do anything else anymore. bcoz i feel the more i do is just pushing myself to the end. I'm really really tired to react like some crazy nuts. doing little little things behind u. *SLAP SLAP*
STOP IT. and go on with your daily life. DANCE TILL U DROP. YES I WILL
dance till i die should be the correct words for me. hahahaha

Soon will be going to the hospital n hang antibiotic..:D too skinny, not eating much, no appetite, dance too much, muscle n body all start to pain.. not good at all.. see how long i can tahan la..

Thursday, March 17, 2011

What else :X

I'm still in a bad emotion level..thought i have recover and a better life to go on as i get my new car, everything seem smooth but i never expected there is still hurtful stuff that will pull me down to earth ground. Haizz. Why must i go through it again n again. I so cannot tahan with all this already really give up this time.

It was march 6 i drive down to look for u and spend few days with u. But end up i found out something that hurt me to the max. I never know u are still lying to me bcoz of her. I have go through all this again n again this time i GIVE UP. I really feel like leaving this dem place without looking back., but there is too much memory and i feel very angry just to walk away bcoz i have put so much effort n so do u. BUT WHY DO U STILL DO THIS?????
I so hope that u were in my shoes to go through all this f*cking feeling and still need to put a smile when working n pretend myself is alright. I calm myself down n talk n talk n talk. but i just can't stop thinking about it. So i drink n drink and talk all out. i really donno how u feel n what u think about me? U are just good by keeping quiet and just say the same things since the first time we talk about this. I donno how to trust u or even believe what u say.
I know so much n i still can remain so cool n calm. I so wanted to ask advise from elderly ppl but i feel it will turn out to be the worst impression n bad reputation to u. I'm still so lost ..

Why? Why? what have i did in my past live to deserve all this shits? because i runaway from marriage? tell me why.. is my love life got to be like that.. if really tell me in my dream or face to face that i'm born to be *alone ranger* . then i will be and walk away from everything. Just put my career n family. So confusing and feel myself overwork for the future.
I"M FUCKING TIRED... with everything but i still carry on bcoz is my choice, but i'm starting to tell myself to let go if things doesn't really working out.
Staying n trying is not the way.
Patience n Toleration is with limit.
When u over the limit i will explode and THE END!!

this is the first time i ever wrote something with bad words. I'm always cool n think about others but does others think about me? so what the hell.. My Blog this is how i talk out my problems. no where else i can talk like this bcoz i'm a teacher to so many kids, teenagers, aunty, ladies. People will say what teacher is this talking all the bad words. Control Control but not here in my blog. Been controlling myself for the past few years . ENOUGH!!
i want to be sexy, pretty, girl girl,
i want more shoes, n high heel,
i want skirt n dress.
Slim BODY.. don dem care about anything. Love myself will rewards mylife better.

Sorry i being rude but i like it.. FMLL..

Friday, March 4, 2011 a bee

March 4th and my schedule is almost fully written on my book. I feel myself abit like robot n overwork. I like it but is a bit insane looking at my schedule. I find it really over n is getting more class as day pass. People call me for classes, i feel happy but at the same time i feel tired n stress. Yes money n finacial will be better but does my health going to improve or is going to get worst.I really don dare to think about @@. I still miss competing with Soul Krazy at least everyday get to laugh out loud, sometimes emo emo a bit here n there, scream n shout in the studio like nobody business, eat n play althought is at critical moment of the competition. But i feel that is the time i'm missing now. SIGH!!

I really feel so tired with all my classes but that's my job. I wan to get back on track with dancce competition and improve more in dancing. How do shouldi go back? Feel a bit bored keep dancing the old dance for performance and shows. I wan to do something sexy,cool, fresh routine but i just don't have the time to edit music n find idea for it. :( am i lazy or just busy?
I need to push myself to the end so i will start moving forward. When should i start training for upcoming comp? or still stick to the old way last minutes RUSH LIKE HELL!!@#$% better not for this time. *SLAP* i better do it now so SK can really keep up with the dance routine by the time of competition. HMM.. JUST DO IT!! like nike say.. hahaha

I always find myself having this problem with my group. When problem occurs i will keep quiet n observe, but just dowan to say it out.Will the problem become a bigger problem after a while or it will gone like wind. Will the problem solve by itself or do i need to come up to a stage to say out bad words n make a bad decisions. I JUST HATE IT. why every group must have all this problems? i has to overcome all this problem again n again. Just feel tired :X i hope to find the guts one days n say it out!! being a solo is easy as a click of finger but being in a group is putting 2hand together to clap. i got 2pairs of hand clapping with me but can the clap be forever or just for a moment. Hope for the best..

My busy life is getting sosososo sucky bcoz i'm weak. I need to eat proper food at proper time to keep me going. my sick n weak body is bringing me down to earth. DEM!! hate it so much.
I need to buckle up n start my engine for SK practice. I think time is up n SK need to start moving before everyone of us pancit tayar n become spare tayar..XD slimming session need to start n dance dance dance.. krazy dance on the way..Pluck grass go away.. YES DO IT!!


Monday, February 28, 2011

Story 1

After CNY and Valentine's over, everything seem to be so quiet..I'm no longer stress about choreography, music editing,dateline of music n everything. I'm back to teaching dance classes everyday till i find myself over work with classes everyday. it make me so tired n start thinking again. Life is just about working, earning money n save it up or is about to enjoy ur life while u still can? i been thinking what do i wan to achieve in life? Have i achieve whatever i dream of?

I'm a scorpio. I'm the most scary zodiac in the horoscope circle. WHY? I can remember simple things, i hold grudges, i take longer time to move on, but i'm loyal in love, patience, hardworking, determine. SO call i'm crazy n hyperactive in work. DREAM* i have achieve it with the guts of letting go my marriage at the age of 23 to be a mrs.housewife with luxury life. I have become a lil star in dance circle for hip hop n line dance. i have travel to many places n explore myself to so many dance scenes. I'm satisfied :) I'm now a dance instructor teaching in so many dance studio with lots of students n love from them.SOUL Krazy my group of girls that i never thought it will grow this far. People always say girls is complicated n hard to handle, for me is how you find a way to compromise each other, tolerate, n the passion in DANCE as a group. When there is a will there is always a way. So i believe in each of them to give me their heart to work the way up. not to be the best but to be proud I'm SOul Krazy.

I'm always a loser in my relationship, think back about the past relationship i never really put much attention or heart into it..MIGHT be because i was busy fighting for my dreams n career, too hardworking till forget there is someone who love me n need my love n cares.. When i share my past story, ppl find me is scary n bad girl..hahaha i really never realize about it.
People see me now is such a good girl n hardworking, maybe the past does taught me alots of human characters, life n thoughts.. I realize loving someone is easy but to forget someone is always hard. and found out that girls nowadays is so daring n will do whatever to get the man's they like or love. I just feel so tired. I will say all i want now is love n care by my love one.
Guys always say girls love guy with good looking,money, power,cars,house. As for me if u got money i'm lucky, if u handsome i'm proud, if u are rich i will say bye bye.. PHOBIA with rich guy.
I only need love n cares, bcoz that is money can't buy. Thoughtful gift n surprise is a memory can't be erased. ALL this make a relationship stay forever. i never think this way till i found u. maybe u make me realize is important to make an efforts to make things happen. LOVE is powerful.. all i need is TLC :)

Wednesday, February 16, 2011


Over the months i have been very paranoid, emotional, crying, no appetite, weak in everything. all this is when u are badly hurt in love. i barely share it to anyone except my girls, but i really putting a FULL STOP to all this by telling myself on this date 11022011 where me n him celebrated our early valentine at universal studio singapore. i told myself this is a new beginning for me n him on this special date.

i thought i was giving up at the beginning but i was wrong.. i never instead i shower him with more of my love that i neglected when i was busy competing my dance competition.there are people saying why will u still do all this.. * i answer bcoz i love him n i trust his love*
some will say *becky u not tired meh drive up n down sg like going kl* i will always say tired but my bf is singaporean so this is the way we love n spend time without thinking of the tiredness..
all this adventure, travelling, is already more than a year..
i see this relationship is such a miracle..

ON 11022011 is the day we celebrate early valentines at universal studio.. i was surprise that he bought me a Longchamp handbag n also handphone cover with my pic of (me n him) N (soul krazy). i never except him to buy all this bcoz i know how tight is his wallet. I'm very happy bcoz at last i have my own longchamp bag n good experience in Universal studio.. loving it so much.

i might be a bit crazy keeping all my cash just to buy him a **ipad**.. it has to be so bad that machines in Sunway out of stock i got to rush to Lot10 to buy it.. arghh make my wed a hectic day,lucky my mini myvi still working well tat day. hate the apple workers :X look down on u when u wear a shirt n baggy pants. don even wan to serve u, end up i just walk to the counter then i ask
me ;* do u have 3g n wifi ipad*
apple: yes we have 16g
me: yes 1 please
apple: open their big eyes
me: yes i please
apple: ok, total .....
me: here u go....
apple: CASH!!
me: yes, quick i'm in a rush
apple: ok thank u thank u

this is what u call money really can shut people face n mouth.. hAIZZZZ
think so many way to surprise him with ipad end up i bocor my own rahsia.. :(
my hiding skill not tat good anymore.. hahaha
at least i know he is so happy with it..
been so long i never see his happy smile face.. :)
i'm happy with his valentines gift so do him..
we both celebrated with lots of love..althought he was call up to work after tat..

everyone i'm coming back slowly the hyperactive, happy go lucky becky..just give me time..
sorry sooki i can't send u or meet u before u leave i feel so bad.. but i promise u the happy n cheerful sifu will be back when u come back.. miss ya babe

i'm back people.. hope this blog will be a happy blog soon.. :)

Thursday, January 13, 2011


2011.. how u celebrate your new year? i celebrate my new year performing for samsung event n @live a club.. do i enjoy it? answer is NO maybe bcoz i don have my love one with me, but lucky i have my girls von n cynthia to cheer me up a little..i remember i super hyperactive, maybe bcoz i told myself to being happy then so emotional..i drop into a emotional box for almost 2months and i still inside but to get rid of it i start to be the old rebecca lee, that go out every night, drinks with friends, krazy around, mix with all the friends that i really don keep in touch with.. WHY I DO THAT? simple bcoz i want to stop myself for being paranoid n emotional..

i really donno what i want or need in my life? i'm so lost.. feel like scream out loud HELP!! but is just not me... so i rather get myself drunk every night, go club, dance n stay hyper like crazy woman also i dowan to think all the rubbish that happen to me.. all this night life just not me, i don even feel good with it but that is the best way or only way to stop me from thinking.. Feel like give up bcoz i feel is a never ending story between both partys.. i choose to stop checking, thinking but it does show that i'm giving up slowly.. i donno know when it going to end but i might end it one day.. just to help myself althought i know it might hurt me very badly, or i will end up losing myself..

Words of truth n fact of life

** sometimes the past is something we just can't let go of.. & sometimes the past is something we'll do anything to forget..

***** do something u love & u will find someone who loves the same thing.
don't look for love, beg for love,or suffer for love, JUST LIVE

** is only takes one minute to break someone's heart. But it takes a lifetime to forgive that person for breaking it..

***** give your smile for everyone, but your love to someone

** falling in love means letting yourself fall even though there is a chance you might get hurt

there are more love,life quote i read bcoz all this is the one that bring me back to who i am now n i learn more from what guys, girls think with all this n love is always complicated just look at how we handle it..

Wednesday, December 29, 2010

Time is UP!!

dear blog.. after btg final, i'm out to Singapore the next dayn start my holiday there with baby..
we went to batam on monday, n we went for para-sailing, banana boat, n jetski.. it was a wonderful holiday i ever have in this year.. not only that we went for 2hours quite expensive but worth the price bcoz is really relaxing n calm feeling inside the spa place..don feel like leaving the placce bcoz i feel so peaceful n calm.. then on wedenesday we back to SG n we went to PS cafe for x'mas dinner bcoz baby flying off to Melbourne the next day n only be back on Christmas day.. so we have early christmas dinner.. but i didn't went back KL after he left to Melbourne but i hang around at SG for 2more days. so i stay at my adek house *reela* thank you so much for taking care of me..

On 25th went to town walk around n met up with my betina Wai fong one of my kl friend for tea break.. then accompany her to Lucky Plaza n bought a archos something like ipad.. then off i go to changi airportto fetch my baby.. then we went back home n rest then out for dinner..
woooohoo we went to Newton Circus for dinner, we had crab n seafood.. after dinner, we go to rebels with all his clubbing kaki.. been so long i never club, i just can't stop dancing n drinking.. i feel like i'm back to my old days.. have so much fun n happy bcoz clubbing with my baby.. :)
then the next day i'm going back to KL bcoz he is flying to darwin.. send him off to airport n off i go back KL..

Now i'm back to kl i'm just keep myself busy with all the dance shows n classes.. but my mind is missing him so much.. can't stop thinking about him.. When all this things start i'm getting paranoid again.. for almost 2days i'm so pyscho n krazy over words.. after all this, i need to tell myself to STOP being so paranoid n pycsho, this is not Rebecca Lee.. I'm not like tat n i hate to be paranoid over stuff around.. So i told myself, i need to Stop all this rubbish thinking n back to my track..being a happy go lucky me with no stress but happy life...remember people telling me alots of stuff about life,love, career.. remember every single things ppl tell me is a advise n do help me alots.. i really wish i have someone to share my problem., but somehow is so hard to share sometimes.. i hate sharing but sometimes i love to share when it come to joys n happiness..
my feeling is just unstable.. STOP IT!!! *SLAPLet's bring back the Rebecca Lee everyone use to know.. the happy go lucky, krazy, laugh like nobody busy, always hyperactive, smile all the time, energy level always on the top.. bring it back to my soul...PRAY!!